Being new in this town, I decided to go exploring, find out what the locals enjoy, and expand my boundaries by taking a trip to—the local mall. Yes, mall. In fact, I did discover different cultural offerings, evidenced below!

Who’s the real OG Kimbab King?

The Korean obsession is alive and well on the ground-floor of a mall in Khon Kaen. This restaurant—named “Kimbab King” (wow) (hmm…) (my grandmother might be the OG Kimbab King) offers a variety of Korean kimbab—or sushi rolls—for those of you who have not yet joined the K-obsession. 

Let’s review the menu: 

“Spicy Wagyu Bulgogi Kimbab”: Features wagyu beef marinated in bulgogi marinade, presumably grilled over high-fire charcoal the traditional way…or not… . Also included are shredded carrots, a stick of imitation crab, yellow pickle, sliced omelet, and spinach. The imitation crab is not customary in kimbab rolls.

“Original Kimbab”: It’s the Spicy Wagyu Bulgogi Kimbab, minus the spicy wagyu bulgogi beef.

“Tuna-mayo Kimbab”: Definitely not authentic, and definitely not ingredients my OG Kimbab King grandmother would use.

“Spicy Cheese (Fire-Chicken) Kimbab”: So, a couple of things. The Korean characters translate as “Spicy cheese fire-chicken kimbab”, but the picture doesn’t show any chicken. The Thai script translates as “Spicy yummy cheese kimbab”. In any case, the rice is colored a spicy red, and there’s a glob of red in the middle of the roll, presumably the spicy-yummy-cheese. It doesn’t say the type of cheese, but it’s definitely not fire-chicken-cheese. Proceed at your own risk.

“Tonkatsu Kimbab”: Ok, so this definitely is not authentic Korean, considering tonkatsu is from Japan. Based on the photo, I do not see any ramen noodles. Perhaps the rice is flavored with the pork-bone broth, or there may be a wedge of pork in the roll, but it’s difficult to see in the picture.

“Japchae” and “Tteokbokki” dishes both include an image of the Korean flag with the tag, “Made in Korea”, so I would assume those items have been imported, and are not being cooked fresh at the restaurant.

This sign translates as “It takes courage to take care of Ji-shin”. 

Hotteok adjacent in the basement

Hmm… I can confirm the sign’s message has nothing to do with the contents in the case. The contents appear to be various forms of fried dough. I don’t recognize anything except for the bottom row, which may be “hotteok“—pronounced “hoe-dduck”. It is a sweet Korean pancake, filled with brown sugar and cinnamon, and fried to a golden brown in plenty of oil. I’ve eaten them fresh from a street vendor on the streets of Seoul, and can confirm that the greasy paper and residue on my lips and face testified to a hot, yummy, gooey, extravagantly indulgent sweet treat. 

These hotteok, in the basement of a mall in a small town in Thailand, are a distant second-cousin of a step-aunt that no one talks about anymore. I would give this entire case a pass. Maybe “Ji-shin” will get the care he needs… .

Continuing my stroll in the mall, I entered this large supermarket and the first thing I saw was this large display. Whoa! Am I in California, or Khon Kaen? Wha….? You mean I can still buy Kirkland brand Costco nuts in this small town?

Yes! Mixed nuts and cashews, salted and toasted for 599THB, equaling around $20. Customers can also buy Kirkland brand shiitake mushroom chips, or freeze-dried strawberries.

Mosquito explosion

Because I was not able to legalize my documents in Bangkok, the recruiter arranged for us to go to a city four hours away for walk-in legalization services. It was all day in on the road: We departed by 7:30am, and spent ten hours going back and forth.

When I got back to my room—much to my dismay—I returned to a room full of mosquitoes. There must have been larvae that exploded into mosquitoes everywhere. They were numerous and vicious; breezing across my cheek, leaving giant welts on my thighs. I grabbed the can of bug spray, and fumigated in the bathroom—which is a perpetual swamp-breeding-ground-for-water-loving-organisms. 

Due to engineering ignorance, the shower drain was located in the center of the floor, but the floor tilted to the left, so there was always a pool of stagnant water. Although I used a wiper to move most of the water to the drain, inevitably, there was always a pool of water in the shower. It also caused a persistent stench of rotten water, which smelled like diarrhea.

Hence, the thick cloud of mosquitoes I was battling. I realized that although I had sprayed the shower, I continued to get mosquito bites on my body, so I sprayed the entire room; in the corners, behind the mini-fridge, around the bed, every corner of the ceiling. By the end of it, I had unloaded the entire can.

My floor was a graveyard of zillions of black dots—mosquito corpses. Additionally, I was choking on the toxic fumes floating heavily in the air. I slept all night in the toxic stench of bug spray and rotten-water-diarrhea.

Oh, and by the way,  my toilet starting to grow black mold inside. 

This is a photo of the air conditioner’s exhaust unit on my balcony.  The day I moved in, there was a dead baby bird underneath it. I discovered a large bird’s nest in the exhaust unit. The maintenance person removed the nest, but the parent birds kept returning, trying to re-build their home. Thus, I bought aluminum foil and taped it all over the unit, over any place the birds could perch or rest. It did the trick. For the equivalent of $.50, no mo birds.

Below: picturesque café with outdoor seating, underneath a canopy of trees. The sleeping dog stretches out in full prostration.